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Storm Chasers: An Oklahoma City Thunder Season Preview

US Presswire

US Presswire

This year, for the first time, Hickory-High will be tackling the challenging of crafting season previews for all thirty NBA teams. Beginning today we’ll be rolling out these previews, one each day, leading up to Opening Night. This was a task of considerable size and complexity and it required the help of every member of our staff. The only guidelines given were that each writer approach team by staying true to their own style and the result is season previews of a difference sort. We hope you enjoy!

30 Previews, 30 Days

9/29 – Orlando Magic
9/30 – Charlotte Bobcats
10/1 – Cleveland Cavaliers
10/2 – Phoenix Suns
10/3 – New Orleans Pelicans
10/4 – Sacramento Kings
10/5 – Washington Wizards
10/6 – Detroit Pistons
10/7 – Minnesota Timberwolves
10/8 – Portland Trail Blazers
10/9 – Toronto Raptors
10/10 – Philadelphia 76ers
10/11 – Milwaukee Bucks
10/12 – Dallas Mavericks
10/13 – Boston Celtics
10/14 – Utah Jazz
10/15 – Atlanta Hawks
10/16 – Los Angeles Lakers
10/17 – Houston Rockets
10/18 – Chicago Bulls
10/19 – Golden State Warriors
10/20 – Brooklyn Nets
10/21 – Indiana Pacers
10/22 – New York Knicks
10/23 – Memphis Grizzlies
10/24 – Denver Nuggets
10/25 – Los Angeles Clippers
10/26 – San Antonio Spurs
10/27 – Oklahoma City Thunder
10/28 – Miami Heat
All Previews

Once, a young man was admitted to a hospital, and no thunder was heard.

Once, blood was analyzed in a laboratory and no thunder was heard.

Once, powerful lamps were turned on in an operating room, and no thunder was heard.

Once, IV tubes were inserted in veins, and no thunder was heard.

Once, a young man was wheeled into surgery, and no thunder was heard.

Once, an anesthesiologist stuck a needle into a thickly muscled arm, and no thunder was heard.

Once, an anesthesiologist stuck needles into a long, graceful neck, and no thunder was heard.

Once, a nurse scrubbed a leg for ten full minutes, and no thunder was heard.

Once, a body and table were draped with sheets to create a sterile field, and no thunder was heard.

Once, a tourniquet was place around a slender thigh, and no thunder was heard.

Once, an elastic rubber bandage was applied so tightly it squeezed more of the the blood out of a leg, and no thunder was heard.

Once, a tourniquet was inflated, and no thunder was heard.

Once, a surgeon outlined in iodine an incision around the edges of a knee, and still no thunder was heard.

Once, pale smooth skin was incised along a premarked line and dissected down to the bone, while silence prevailed on the plains of Oklahoma.

Once, arteries and veins were divided and tied, and a nerve was separated and allowed to detract into a wound, without an accompanying rumble or clap.

Once, a joint was opened, and it wasn’t a new roadhouse nor were any storms brewing overhead.

Once, cartilage was trimmed and smoothed before being sewn back together, requiring such exertion that the surgeon could not have heard any thunder, even if it was present to be heard.

Once, a drain was placed in a wound, and no thunder was heard.

Once, man flesh was sewn shut with four-ought nylon suture, and the mouths of the storm gods were sewn shut as well.

Once, a pressure dressing was applied to the knee, but no amount of pressure could induce the thunder to sound.

Once, a tourniquet was deflated, a bloody leg bathed, and a numb young man rolled to a recovery room, ten toes edging out from under a blanket and pointing towards the sky.

Once, a nurse and two surgeons, their attention directed by the gravity of their completed task, turned to stare at a metal tray covered with instruments of hope stained with the blood red markings of despair.

And no thunder was heard.

Editor’s Notes:
1) May not be factually accurate
2) Inspired by and adapted (blatantly plagiarized) from Tom Robbins’ novel, Even Cowgirls Get The Blues

  • JASherman

    Basically what you’re saying is that the Thunder’s season rises and falls on the strength of a fine thread.

    Talk about a Sword of Damocles…

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